Felix Adler, founder of Ethical Culture, wrote, “The dead are not dead if we have loved them truly. In our own lives we can give them a kind of immortality. Let us arise and take up the work they have left unfinished.” I use this quotation whenever I officiate at a non-theistic memorial and invite family and friends to recall something about the person who has died that they can imagine incorporating into their own lives, some way in which they can take up the work that loved one has left unfinished.

It addresses an experience of both mourning and celebrating our finite lives. Awareness of our mortality and accepting that there is no life after death frees us to be more fully ourselves: appreciating life with all its joys and sorrow, recognizing that we are part of the natural world, realizing our potential and responsibilities as human beings, and choosing to engage in ethical relationships.